I received my first copy of Triathlete’s World magazine a week or so ago. The only reason I subscribed was because the website of the same name had some interesting test reviews of the kit you need. They publish the introduction to the articles to get you interested, then tell you you have to be a subscriber to read the reviews and conclusions.

I thought that was fair enough, it has all the information I need and will help me integrate into my new community. After a wait of over a month the first issue arrived, I grabbed it and flicked through.

Massive disappointment.

No ‘buy this bike, this kit, and follow this training plan for instant triathlon success’.



For a week or two it sat there untouched, a silent reproach for impulsively subscribing to a magazine I’d never read.

Yesterday I picked it up for something to read in bed. It’s actually bloody good.


The article to which the title of this entry refers is not what I wanted at all, though!

Some chap, very competitive, did a duathlon (run, bike, run) with some triathletes, decided to do the ‘sprint distance’ event (750 metre swim, 20k ride, 5k run).

Then he heard about Iron Man distance as some chap at his works had done one.

He thought “Well, if he can do it, I must be able to.”

Is this starting to sound familiar to anyone yet? I can’t put my finger on it, but it’s like I know someone like that.


As a step-up he then did a half I.M distance race (1.2 mile swim, 56 mile ride, 13.1 mile run) and it all went horribly wrong.

“I’m never going to win a triathlon. but I love getting out there, seeing other people pushing themselves, pushing myself as hard as I can, trying to get faster. The half-Iron Man event wasn’t like that- it was a war of attrition. On at least a dozen occasions I wanted to stop, just stop.” …”I didn’t pull out. Instead I shuffled off to start the most torturous run I have ever been on and several hours later shuffled across the finish line. Then I waited for the amazing sense of achievement to kick in- I’m still waiting.”

He has abandoned, or at the very least put on indefinite hold, his full I.M. plans.


Not what I wanted to read at all!

He had already done the (admittedly bit gay) sprint distance tri, and presumably had trained for the half, but still found it more than he could handle. I’ve done a bit of running and entered a full I.M.. Shit.

I was actually looking forward to the half as a bit of a giggle, nice splash about in the sea off Cornwall, scenic ride, pleasant run to stretch my legs off. I keep telling myself that I did that 51 mile ride then 13 mile run within the time at my first attempt. But there is the accumulative affect of each discipline. Perhaps the swim will make the ride a lot harder, then the run even harder yet. The run after the ride was hellish, it put a minute on each mile.

I must, post haste, do a mock half. My next day off is Thursday, if it is  at least a few degrees above zero I will do it then.

I’m hoping that it was his attitude that was at fault. I know it is an endurance race, where finishing all you are after. It ain’t going to be fun. It will be painful and a battle of will. Like that bike racer said “pain is temporary, quitting is forever.”

He, the I.M. aspirant, seemed to think it was going to be fun.


Must do the whole half, ASAP. Then I’ll know what I am up against.


After the two weeks enforced laziness (due to ice and snow) I got off my arse on my days off. Did a short but windy ride to Helsby (30 hill-ish) miles followed by a 7 mile run. Then the day after went out and did a 17.35 miles run. It was supposed to be an 18 miler, but I cocked it up a bit. Irritating. Anyway, I am on track for my marathon run in Wales on the 10th of April.

Work are still dicking me about with the bike. Finally got it all sorted; bike package, codes, websites, etc, etc, got to the final bit ‘enter amount in pounds’ when I found out that although the government scheme is up to £1,000. DHL have set the ceiling at £500. The package I want is a snip at £664!


Still trying to negotiate a deal with them over it. As soon as I get an answer, yes or no, I’ll get the bike then join the Warrington triathlon club! Oh yes, there is such a beast! Joy!

I’d be too embarrassed to turn up to the group training ride on my old heap!

They do coaching and training in all three disciplines. That is what I need, someone to push me. My running covers the distance, eventually. Faster is better.

Well, I’ve paid up for the full I.M., no backing out now. If it’s impossibly hard that just means I have to train impossibly harder! Or cheat. Could I disguise a moped as a push bike? It’s a thought.