Category: Life

No, not Slim Shady, just me.

I’ve been having a weird old time of it. Not enough work but too much. I can’t seem to get a steady 5 days but what shifts I get are buggering everything else up. Not enough time for karate or runs.  Last week I worked the Sunday as well, which is usually the only day I can guarantee I can get to karate.

Then the bills have all hit at once.

I let my motorbike insurance renew (full year’s riding, only one crash! Go me!) and the sneaky buggers didn’t renew the monthly payments, took it all at once. Cheaper in the long run, but a nasty surprise.

When I was considering getting this bike the reviewer (here if you want a good read: http://www.realclassic.co.uk/kawasakiw650.html ) said the standard upgrades were to the carbs (done) and shocks. I’ve been putting them off because they are expensive and not high on my (purely aesthetic) cafe racer agenda. Anyway, last week as I tipped it into a corner the front end skipped out. Only an inch or so, too quick for me to react, but a wake up call. Usually when you lose the front end the first you know of it is watching the bike sliding away in a shower of sparks. I know whereof I speak. So stiffer, progressive, fork springs then, post haste. £130. *sad face*

I got them and they said you can either fit them properly by taking the front end off, or do a half arsed job leaving the forks attached. Sweet. Half arsed it is.

“Drain the fork oil out of the bottom of the forks.”

No drain hole on this model.

Of course.

So front wheel off, brakes off, mudguard off, forks out.

OK. Huge allen bolts holding the front wheel on, lots bigger than standard sizes in an allen key set. Ace. Shop.

Turned one side other side span. Needed another huge allen key. 

Shop.

Finally got the wheel off and the rest was quite easy. Apart from the fork oil coming with the warning that ingestion is lethal. Inhalation is lethal. Skin contact causes cancer. Ace.

I eventually got it all back together. My first tentative ride I couldn’t notice a difference, but the second day, throwing it into a really tight ‘40mph’ corner connecting two motorways the front end was solid as a rock. No juddering or skipping, massive difference.

The weather was really baking and I was off on Wednesday so on a whim I rode to Whitby, home of the goths. It was a lot further than I’d thought, but a great ride out.

When I got there I was well happy. My spiritual home. Goths and bikes. I don’t know if it was a special occasion but there were about 40 or 50 old bikes on the pier. Including a real live Vincent HRD! *we are not worthy, we are not worthy!* Here’s an advert for one if anyone is stuck for xmas prezzie ideas for me:

 

With lovely ruins.

Anyway, that turned out to be a 285 miles round trip. And a sore bum, ringing ears and tingling fingers.

Afterwards I thought I’d better adjust my chain tensioner again, when I noticed this:

The chain is tight up against the top and bottom of the sprocket but has stretched so much it bags off. Balls. New chain and sprocket set (£85) and chain breaking/ riveting tool (£25).

On the bright side all this work has given me a chance to test out my bike jack the parents got me. Spiffy bit of kit. With the genius addition of straps and lashing points.

When you are putting your weight behind some tough nut and the bike moves those straps are worth their weight in gold.

 

Karate is coming on, it’s a very good style. Lots of practical crossover (mixed martial arts, *sigh*) punching techniques. Very practical for real world situations. I just need a fixed work timetable so I can get to regular classes.

To which end I have got another application form and am putting in a proper speculative application. This time, instead of saying I just want days I’m being flexible and once I’m in I’ll get days ASAP.

Hopefully start on days, but if not, take what I can get.

The bike is a joy still, if somewhat expensive at the moment. The good thing is, it’s done about 19,000 miles, the fork oil needed changing anyway, the fork springs are a one time purchase and the chain and sprocket set are guaranteed for 2 years/ 15,000 miles, so they will be sorted for years to come.

I’ll catch up on twitter anon,

for now,

Later,

Buck.

Lots and not a lot happening since my last blog.

Work went mad busy, loads of really long shifts. I was always buggered and I lost my mojo. Even on my days off I just wanted to rest and recuperate. No running, no karate.

This last week had been a bit slack at work, I only got a 3 day week. And a twitter chum was asking for noob running advice, and I started to feel like a fraud so I forced myself to do a run. And that’s all it takes. The more you put it off the less you want to do it, as soon as you do it you are keen to do more.

I’ve still not been to karate, but there is a good reason for that; I’m letting my new tattoo heal first.

For my birthday present I treated myself to a righteous Sisters tat.

That was still in the tattoo shop, the purple tinge is the transfer thing they put on to get the outlines.

Today it’s looking like this:

I love it!

In other ‘stuff I love’, the bike is rocking my world. Still pretty.

I saw an online tutorial on how to make your own cafe racer seat. The frame isn’t flat it’s flat up to the wide point, then kinks up at a steep angle, so I’m not sure a ‘universal’ seat would fit properly. Obviously if you make your own, on your own frame, it’s going to fit. So I set to.

Polystyrene blocks, fancy glue, lots of sandpaper. I surprised myself, and stunned Wendy, by knocking up a bloody good mould.

 

That wasn’t the finished mould, but it was getting there.

Then I just had to coat it in tape, then wax, then fibreglass to make the actual seat.

I thought once I’d got the mould done that was the hard work finished. Just slap some fibreglass on, job’s a good ‘un.

Could I get it to work? Could I buggery.

Because the back is curved down and in I had to try and get the sheeting to fit it. I just couldn’t. It was going everywhere.

In the end I sacked it off. Most miffed.

 

However, I had a bit of a success with that helmet Lisa’s neighbour gave me. I loved the look of it, but it had obviously been unused and going musty for years. Every time I put it on my hair smelled musty. I tried to track on down on the internet but I couldn’t find the same style anywhere. In the end I pulled the fabric out of the lid and machine washed it, whilst washing the attached bits by hand. It smells fine now.

I’d forgotten what fun it is* being battered in the face by driving rain at *cough* 70mph *cough*

(*none whatsoever).

Right, I’ll update twitter and such later.

I had a crap night’s sleep after the run on Thursday (legs glowing and restless) then yesterday afternoon I found out I was on a 02.00 start today. I managed to get about 2-3 hours of naps. Then they gave me a run down to South Wales, 180 miles, 3 hours 45 minutes driving. I’ve been fighting to stay awake all today and frankly I give in.

Tomorrow will be better.

Later.

Buck.

So far, so bloody good.

The job itself is pretty cushy, delivering to big Bookers/ Makros or whatever. These tend to be on industrial estates with lots of easy access. Then all you do is pull your curtains to let them get the pallets off the side of your trailer or jump on the back with a pump truck and move the pallets to the end for the fork lift to take off. The easiest option is when they have a proper dock so you just back up to it and they unload you, but they are not that common.

Then it’s usually go to a relatively local factory or warehouse and pick up a load to take back to Haydock.

They treat the drivers really well as well. On the curtain sided trailers they have a security cord that fits through all the fastens along the curtain, so you can’t open it. I went to one place, they said to open my curtains, so I pulled the cord through, looped it up on the catwalk between the cab and the trailer and pulled my curtains. Then they said to reverse into the bay area. Which I did. Then realised the catwalk is part of the cab, the cord is attached to the trailer, there was a lot of movement, the cord got snagged and snapped.

Bollocks.

At my last place that would have been ‘one strike’. I was expecting drugs and alcohol test and disciplinary procedure. I got back to the office and told them, they said “Go and put a new one on. Be more careful in future.”

Wow.

The downside to the job is the shift length. Either a bare 8 hours, or like last week, 15 hours, 13, 12 etc.

I have been struggling trying to get to karate or do runs.

I have talked to two drivers who are full time, probably they have been dragging the job out and grabbing (which I can’t get my head around. If you can go after 9 hours, I’m gone) but one of them said he made 45K last year, the other said 50K. This was in front of other drivers, so I don’t think they were bullshitting.

For the full timers it’s something like £12 per hour days, plus 20% after 18.00, 25% after midnight, I think one of them said it was time and a third for overtime, time and three quarters for working your sixth shift. If you were doing a 60+ hour week that would soon add up.

The agency have been doing what I want as well. I asked for mornings, the latest I’ve started was 10.30 I think, earliest was 05.30. Pretty much dead what I asked for. Today I asked if I could do regular Sun-Thurs, they said OK. Sent me a text saying work has been pretty slack at Bookers this week (I’ve been in all week, so didn’t know) but they’ve been giving me priority as Bookers ‘like my work’.  Cool. I’ve not been there five minutes but someone’s noticed me.

 

Last weekend I thought I’d try a hill run to strengthen my legs. Whilst looking for the address of a killer hill in Bolton (Winter Hill, a three mile ascent to the tallest hill in the Pennines – thank you Wikipedia-) I noticed the Bolton Hill Marathon has moved from the unbelievably bitter March timeslot to June. I entered there and then. Then went for a run. My first hill run in years. I was dying within 2 miles. I ascended 2,000 feet on the run, most of it in the first 6 miles, and my legs were dying. I was wearing my lungs externally. I was determined to do at least a half but even that was nearly too much. I got a bit of focus back and managed to force out 15 miles, but it was pure misery.

Still, I’ve got 6 weeks until the marathon. No pressure.

On top of work and trying to fit in karate I have a further hurdle to overcome. I’ve come down with a parched throat (at first) then tickle and dry cough and feeling lousy. So that’s super. I’m calling it Bulgarian Plague, even though Lisa hasn’t got it, as I came down with it a few days after meeting my mam, who is fresh over from that well known Euro plague pit.

Right, I’ve had an hour, must be bedtime.

Later,

Buck.

I’ve had my sights set on a Harley Davidson Sportser, just the ‘baby’, the 883 CC one.

As you can see, very pretty.

It was to be a stepping stone then in a few years move up to the Harley I really want, the big Heritage Softail.

Obviously the last word in practicality and knee-down performance with that ground clearance. Surprisingly cheap, starting at around £6- 7K. Well, it surprised me, I thought they were over £10K even old.

But I digress.

I have had my head turned, again, by that Kawasaki W650. A retro bike in the style of it’s 60’s predecessor, the styling of which was in turn ‘influenced’ (stolen wholesale) from the Brit twins of the time.

Look at this:

Just zoom in and marvel at it’s beauty. The peashooter exhausts, the kick-start (kick-start! Ha!) The faux pushrod covers (silver tubes up the side of the engine) the fork gaiters, the finned, air cooled engine, the tank knee pads, the drum rear brake, the absence of plastic. It is a work of art.

The negative part of reviews can only say that it isn’t a screaming race bike. The engine is ‘soft tuned’. Bah and meh! Missing the point. If you want a plastic fantastic 200mph street screamer go and buy a Hayabusa, they are made for the job:

They are not without their own charm, just not what I’m after. They may look as ugly as sin, but ridden right no-one will ever know.

However,the W650 is what I want. ‘Only’ good for 110 mph, looks drop-dead gorgeous, and performs day in day out with the fabled Japanese reliability.  It’s like time travelling back and getting a new Bonneville, but one that works. Great electrics, lights you can see by and by which you can be seen, no oil leaks, engine doesn’t go ‘pop’ every few weeks… as the man said, ‘As near as you can get to the real thing without pushing it home at night.’

Told you I was obsessing.

Then, as if that wasn’t good enough, it lends itself perfectly to being ‘cafe racer-ed’.

Cafe racers were a 50’s/ 60’s thing. At the time, I’ve read, the working man couldn’t afford a car so had to get a cheap bike for running around. These mostly had the sit-up-and-beg riding position of the one above.

When people wanted to make them into boy-racer machines on the cheap (to race their mates when they met in the biker cafes) they simply put ‘clip-on’ (dropped, racing style) handlebars on so they could lay over the tank to reduce drag, they moved the foot controls to the back (rearsets) put a 2-into-1 exhaust on (to lose weight) ditched the fat knacker off the back and put a single seat on. Job done. Your pedestrian Volvo estate turned into a smoking hot-hatch Golf.

Look at this then:

(Sorry about the quality, I’m trying to source a better picture of this exact bike.)

*That*, my friend, is a cafe racer.  And it’s the Kwak W650. That transcends beauty, it is sublime. Simple, elegant, clean lines, the perfect modern retro cafe racer.

That is going to be an inspiration* for my design. (*I’m going to copy it exactly and fear not the sin of plagiarism.)

Sometime you have to just say ‘that is as good as it gets.’

Everything now is a means to that end.

Must. Have. Kwak!

Just re-reading this. I should point out it’s purely an aesthetic thing. It looks beautiful. If you want to go fast you need the aerodynamic plastic and a different engine. I refer you to the Hayabusa. This is just for pottering around thinking you’re a 60’s rocker on his way to the Ace Cafe.

Like ya do.

A final point I suppose I should mention; Wendy is intractably opposed. Not out of innate git-ishness (as I supposed) or because I selfishly want to blow the best part of four grand of our money on something she’ll never use and I might be chucking down the road, but because she thinks I’ll kill myself.

I think I’m old enough now to ride sensibly. If I’m not and I start getting points then the bike has to go, I can’t lose my job. Nowadays I read the road and am far more aware of things that are going to happen then any car driver. I see situations before they happen and anticipate other people’s reactions way before they’ve even noticed.

And if someone does kill me on the bike, well, you’ve got to die of something.

I don’t drink, smoke or do other drugs, I want something fun in my life or what’s the point?

Skydiving is not for you.

Trying again, with another agency. Since I got binned 5 weeks ago, I’ve had 2 days work (for the thrice damned Stobarts). One of the agencies, that was advertising “Warrington job, trunking to Scotland and Darn Sarf” (then tried to give me jobs 30 miles away) got back to me two weeks ago saying driving assessment for the job I applied for, the following week. On Friday I went for a ‘driving assessment’. It turned into a 4 hour hour induction, site walk, health and safety briefing, drugs and alcohol test, loads of paperwork and finally a drive, which I passed. It’s not in Warrington (only 10 or so miles away at Haydock) it wasn’t just a driving assessment, and it isn’t trunking, it’s store deliveries.

So, nothing at all that they advertised. *sigh*

I start tomorrow. There are hopeful signs. I googled it, someone had asked what they were like to work for and the reply was “my mate works for them, cards in, and he says he’s there for life.”

As I’ve previously noted, all drivers do is whinge, so that’s hopeful. Also it’s delivering to Cash and Carry’s, so it’s not going to be poxy little high street shops. And it’s fully unionised, which is a nice novelty these days.

I noticed on the daily sheet for full time drivers they have a box for double time and triple time, also the sixth day working is paid at time and three quarters! That is shockingly good. And the agency asked me when I wanted to work, said ideally Mon-Fri 05.00-06.00 hrs start, they asked if a 06.00-10.00 window was OK, not a problem. I start at 07.15 tomorrow. That’s promising.

We’ll see tomorrow.  If I don’t love it, the other agency still haven’t got back to me about the Sainsburys induction, I could try that when it comes up. It is directly across the road from this job.

 

In other news the plaster has been round to mend the hole in the ceiling caused by the flood. Which meant we had to decorate. I’d forgotten what a time consuming pain in the arse that job is. It took two days to paint the kitchen, toilet and adjoining space. And all the doors, which showed up as yellowing when I started doing the skirting boards. Then the wooden blinds looked minging so the third day I had to get a new roller blind, which took 3 trips to the shop. Defective crap. Now we need to replace the lino. It’s not dear but it is going to be a total ballache to fit.

That was not all the painting we did.

Stupid bloody cat had to get in on the action.

Now she lives in fear of serial rapist French skunk, Pepe LePew.

 

In other news, I was at my Karate class on Friday when the main sensei (instructor/ master) asked to see how I was getting on. Told me to do a few katas (set sequence of moves) then punches, blocks, takedowns and kicks. Half way through I started thinking, “hang on, this feels a lot like a grading”. It was. I was totally unprepared. Normally they set grading days and you have weeks to practise. I passed. I am no longer a noob white belt but a full-on ninja yellow belt now! Men fear me, women want me, tramps shun me.

 

Also there’s the running. I had sacked it off for a month due to the cold, concentrating on Karate training, and general bone idle laziness. I had put it off so long it had reached a crisis point. I was on wavering over quitting altogether. I even put it to Wendy that I might quit and concentrate on Karate. She said it would be a shame as I’ve been doing that a lot longer.

I focused my chi and went for 10 mile run, the following day I did 8 miles, at the weekend I tested my fitness with a long run and managed 17 miles. Not the 20 I was hoping for, but not the 10 I was fearing.

I’m still in a position to get up to speed for the 50 miler in September.

I will have to see how this new job pans out. If it is early AM starts and not too long shifts, I could alternate my running with Karate training.

 

But enough of my wittering, time to catch up with Twitter.

 

The DMreporter had:

SECURITY: Friday’s solar eclipse "could be the perfect opportunity for ISIS to launch a nuclear attack on Britain" warn terror experts.

BUDGET: Personal tax allowance rises to £11,000, pauses then starts again from £300,000.

STEPHEN GLOVER: "Jeremy Clarkson’s real crime is being everything the educated, Guardian reading luvvies at the BBC hate."    And assault.

ATTENTION!: We’ve decided that the flight path between Barcelona and Düsseldorf is now called ‘the route of death.’ Y’know, out of respect.

 

 

In Politics/ Tory Scum we had:

Gordon Brown is highest earning MP with £1.37m – but he gives it all to charity http://www.heraldscotland.com/news/home-news/gordon-browns-earnings-go-to-charity.1369735549 …

Ed Miliband: "A country where the next generation is doing worse than their parents is the definition of a country in decline." So true Ed.

Tories consider limiting child benefit to three children. The three children have yet to be named, but are believed to live in Oxfordshire.

Last thing..for those having a go at pensioners today..may I remind you 1) the state pension will be £115.95 and 2) I’ll never vote Tory

Hey, Farage. Racist isn’t something you call yourself, it’s denoted by your thoughts and actions. Hence, you are a racist, like it or not.

Nigel Farage has a German wife – surely the ultimate proof that the British just get immigrants to do the jobs no one here can face doing.

What a 24 carat fucking baton. Imagine your kid saying that to you? You’d rather hear ‘Dad, I’m a paedo.’

Michael Gove said to schools "the culture of re-sits is wrong" and cost kids second chances. The same man failed his driving test 7 times

"Britain is paying its way" says Osborne -Coalition will leave behind more debt than all Labour Government’s combined http://www.politics.co.uk/comment-analysis/2014/06/17/the-coalition-will-leave-more-debt-than-all-labour-governmen …

Ha! Cameron not to stand for PM if elected for third term. Don’t count your chickens, Dave, you’ve not been elected once, yet. #twat

David Cameron rules out serving a 3rd term as prime minister. He also ruled out inventing time travel, winning X Factor and riding a unicorn

 

 

 

And as ever, loveliest of all, General:

18 month old boy shot by his 3yr old brother in Nashville. The only thing that will stop a small boy with a gun is a smaller boy with a gun.

..And they’re obscuring the stoat’s face because…? #WTF

Hot young poets in your area. Some are bald, others hairier.

My cat is sad because vacuous inspirational quotes with shit artwork seem to be very popular with cats nowadays.

Overtaking someone on foot and having to keep up the uncomfortably fast pace until safely over the horizon

We now have twice as many followers as @UKIP So vote for the @CrapTaxidermy party and we promise to deport all the Grey Squirrels.

America’s Secret War in 134 Countries http://thenat.in/17DDrJb

technically you’re not on fire, the fire is on you. but yes i’ll get some water

I hate when people tell me swearing isn’t necessary. I’m fucking vulgar, not stupid; I know it isn’t fucking necessary.

Lie on your hand until it goes numb and it feels like somebody else is drinking themselves to death.

American Pastor Who Helped Uganda Create ‘Kill The Gays’ Law Will Be Tried For Crimes Against Humanity

Bit personal, but thanks I guess.

When the hairdresser asks you what you do for a living, quickly spin around in the black cape and shout "I’m Batman!"

Clarkson is so important to the BBC that he can lash out at colleagues. Savile was so important he could rape girls. The BBC is the problem!

I’m striking on Friday. No doubt Clarkson would have me shot in front of my daughter while whining about his dinner to an underling.

I think what we’re all overlooking re Clarkson is that it really is v difficult to be a rich, white, straight Tory man in this country today

#Clarkson has had no support from the BBC? They have given him every backup short of airstrikes.

Compiling some 21st century idioms, eg: “I’m so hungry I could punch a producer.”

Clarkson has to adhere to strict dress code for tomorrow’s sacking

"Colin, why has a wormhole opened on the landing?" You wanted one there "I said STAIRgate" [looks up from paper] Uh- "Where’s the baby?"

I think I can speak for everyone when I say that I am a ventriloquist.

For anyone stupid enough to watch #BenefitsBritain here’s a breakdown of the facts. http://www.theguardian.com/politics/2013/apr/06/welfare-britain-facts-myths …

NHS sell-out: Tories sign largest privatisation deal in history worth £780MILLION http://mirr.im/19fiFB5

Watching Superman IV . Not convinced by the science, tbh.

Looking forward to the explanation picture for #Putin‘s absence. Him, shirtless, saving downtown Tokyo from Godzilla.

#putin, barechested, holding back a tsunami

#putin wiping out ebola, eschewing protective equipment, just kicking each bug to death, bare chested.

i have good and bad news Wife: Ok, the bad news? i didn’t clean out the garage Wife:*sigh* the good news? [holds up cat dressed as Thor]

Lot of talk about 3 Muslim girls. No one mentions the 4 radicalised white Christian kids who went abroad to fight with the rebels in Narnia.

COP: Do you know why I pulled you over? VEGAN: Is it because I’m a vegan? COP: What? Of course not VEGAN: I’m a vegan you know

Just bought a house with period features. Though she HATES that as a nickname.

Ed Miliband refusing to go into coalition with the SNP is a bit like that time I refused to leave my wife for Angelina Jolie.

God knew white people would always talk shit and be problematic that’s why he didn’t givve them lips

Conservatives are complaining Girl Scouts promote Lesbianism and Abortion. Pick one, if they become lesbians they won’t need abortions.

NEWS! Osborne’s ‘buy 300 get one free’ budget offer delights heavy drinkers

CALCULATE whether the new budget is good for you by looking at your watch. If it’s worth more than £5k, you’re ok.

Tomorrow’s headlines today Sun: Scorcher Covers Up Mail: Immigrant Triffid Horde Arriving Saturday? Express: Bit Dark Out. Diana Still Dead.

The wealth of the richest 20% has grown by 57% since 2005, whilst the poorest 20% has fallen by 46%

Eclipse from the space station

Birds song stilled, worms aligning themselves North, sheep expressing "behold the dark’s triumph over transient light" in interpretive dance

And lo, there was daylight again. Where’s your god of atheism now, Dawkins?

REMEMBER to reset your sundial after today’s eclipse.

.

Glad Cow Disease

Top tips on avoiding rape:

Sick of the passive aggressiveness of the self service tills at Sainsburys. "Have you swiped your Nectar card?" We both know I haven’t.

Jellyfish may *look* like cute parachutes, but drop thousands of them on a city and see who appreciates your D-Day re-enactment then

Seems a bit harsh to have taken remains of #RichardIII to Bosworth Battlefield. Bit like saying ‘And this is what you could have won…’

I always like the sound of a hung parliament. On meat hooks, preferably.

Omfg! Volunteer at CAB asked Mrs’ Pakistani mate " what are you doing to prevent your kids joining ISIS?"

Quack quack quack quack quack, Quack quack quack quack quack quack quack. Quack quack quack quack quack. #haikuforducks

Still can’t stop laughing at the fact someone accepted this as a fiver in work

LOST A PET? Offering a reward? Use the reward money to buy a new pet and stop wasting everyone’s fucking time.

What a nice touch for the news to start with a 10 minute cuddly tour of Cameron’s house, and awkward questions like ‘aren’t you marvellous’?

I really hate the increasing use of the word "vulnerable" to describe people who are ,more truthfully, "oppressed"

My cat is sad because some cool cats asked him if he’d "done poppers" & he said yes then realised he’d got it wrong.

"I eat whatever I want and I don’t gain any weight…" -People who can Go Fuck Themselves

There’s a new employee. She’s happy. Challenge accepted

After a food fight, 13 year old Florida boy shoots his 6 yr old brother dead, then turns gun on self, commits suicide

Paxman: David Cameron, thank you. Oh, and here’s your arse. [hands Cameron his arse] #BattleForNumber10

How are they not screaming ‘Answer the fucking question, you spam-faced twat!’? Are they drugged? #AskCameron

Why is nobody in the audience asking "why are you selling our NHS to your rich friends, you despicable sack of shit?" #BattleForNumber10

Miliband: "On our membership card it says Democratic Socialist" Kay Burley: "But your name’s Ed." #BattleForNumber10

Did Kay Burley interrupt Cameron? No. She fucking curtsied. She should stop interrupting Miliband. #BattleForNumber10

Of course Kay Burley was neutral during #BattleForNumber10

People are furious about Kay Burley and Jeremy Paxman’s bias during the #BattleForNumber10 http://ind.pn/1FR4rUK

10-year-old girl, pregnant after being repeatedly raped, denied abortion in Wisconsin

Dad eats daughter’s weed brownies, thinks he’s had a stroke http://ind.pn/1CgV10z

This is what homophobia and bullying looks like

Katie Hopkins might just have won election for Labour.

If you shaved a lion and a tiger, you wouldn’t be able to tell them apart because they would have both mauled you to death.

OWNER: The museum’s ready? ME: All the artichokes are in place OWNER: Ha, you mean artifacts [I slam the door shut] ME: U cannot go in there

If you love someone, set them free and hunt them for sport. Now have them stuffed. Congrats. Now you have them forever. It was meant to be.

 

 

(Not a fake, painting from 1500’s!)

What could go wrong?

I, for one, welcome our new Avian overlords.

And finally:

Later,

Buck.