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I can only apologise for my last blog. I read it back the next day and I sound like a total arsehole. It’s taken me a while to work through it but I think I have it. I have a condition, one of the aspects of which is low self esteem. Which is all well and good and you’d think it would keep me from being an dick. However, as it’s not something of which I’m consciously aware, I don’t factor it into knock-on judgements. It bothers me people making a fuss because I don’t think anything I can achieve is that praiseworthy. I actually get angry at people for saying they couldn’t. That is the knock-on effect. I can do it, and I’m shit, so anyone who doesn’t do better is taking the piss. Which leads to me advising noobs on a triathlete forum “If you eat at every feed station, you can do it.”  Bad advice and belittling the heroic failures of some people.  Anyway. I have to bear it in mind. I’ll have to try and accept praise without anger and big up other people’s achievements. It’s got to be better than being the arsehole who wrote that last blog.   The big ride didn’t happen last week. I don’t know if I mentioned it, but I took my bike in to have the gear cables internally routed as I had no idea how to do it. It took the guy a week. I hopped on my bike, rode to the main road, went to change down gear, nothing. I rode back and tried to work out what was wrong. I finally sussed out that where the inner cable goes into the frame there should be a washer to stop the outer cable from following it, thus keeping the cable under tension. The washer had pulled into the frame, the outer cable had slipped in, their was no tension, couldn’t change gear. Balls. The problem is the internal routing. You have to feed the cable in to the end of your tri bars and somehow have it pop out at the end of the frame on the back wheel (what would be a swinging arm on a motorbike). The shop guy, a full-on Ironman age group winner, had made done such a half arsed job that when I was looking at my bike I noticed a screw protruding at the bottom of the downtube. Apparently you unscrew that and a plate comes out, you push the cable in at your handlebars, it pops out of the panel, you then thread it through the (not) swinging arm and improvise some washers to retain the tension. Simple as that. Took me about 15 minutes of fiddling about. Bastard. Tri guy won’t be getting another penny from me. I’m riding in to work in top gear nearly all the time now to build muscles. But my bike started creaking and the chain skipped a few times. Which worries me on […]

I’ve had some really amusing conversations of late. Not humorous, so don’t expect LOLs. Just amused me. Some guy at work as I was getting changed out of my bike gear, got chatting about how he was a pushbiker. I said it was killing me getting my fitness back. The first time I rode 56 miles then ran 13 miles on day one. “YOU RODE 56 MILES?” Well, yes. The race is 2.4 mile swim, 112 mile bike, 26 mile run. IN A DAY? Yes. PEOPLE CAN’T DO THAT! I’ve done two.   Then last Sunday I got an early dart, the transport clerk woman said “you’ll be able to go for a run” No, I’m resting, I did a marathon yesterday. AND YOU DIDN’T TAKE TODAY OFF? No. I went for my swim session in the afternoon.   Then I got a surprise assessment sprung upon me on Tuesday. Over the course of the hours training came up. I said I had the Manchester marathon coming up. Later,as he was saying goodbye he said he hoped I completed the marathon (as though it was an enormous challenge.) I said that’s the warm-down, in the race you have to swim 2.4 miles and ride 112 first.   It sounds like I’m bragging and such. And I am. But people make such a massive deal out of it. OK, it’s quite tough, but that’s why you train. And I’ve just proved the marathon part of it is do-able within 3 months.  I suppose it is quite impressive when you first hear it. That’s why I did it the first time, just to see if I could. And everyone said I couldn’t, so that was motivating. But now, it’s just a case of get on with it and do it. So to meet people who freak out at the slightest challenge is kind of amusing.   Marathon training plans never take you you past 20 miles. They say if you can run 20 miles you can do 26 on the day. That doesn’t work for me. I need to know I can finish a race before I start it. So I did the beastly marathon on done-in legs last week. Wendy’s runner mate at work said that I should rest up now and just do short runs before the race. The marathon last week, after I’d seized my muscles on the “long” ride the day before, was so bad I had to know. So I did another marathon today. Loads better. My legs set a bit in the last 6 miles, but not enough to slow me much. I’m going to get some electrolytes to add to my drinks, they replace the salt and such you sweat out, supposedly stopping cramps. The upshot is, I’m going from zero to 3 marathons in 3 weeks in 3 months! I’ll take that! Tomorrow I’m going to batter a long ride. I hope. And a swim session. The swim with my club last week, I […]

Things are looking up on the training front. As I keep saying, I started from a position of no runs for 5 months, no rides or swims for 4 years, on January the second. Despite missing whole weeks of training due to work battering me with hours, I got it up to 20 miles run. On the bike, I’ve been doing turbo sessions and top gear rides, to and from work, but hadn’t actually tried out a long ride. To be honest, the horror of that first ride to work in January was still hanging over me and I was a bit reluctant, scared even, to set off. Also we’ve had massively untypical freezing weather, which didn’t entice. Anyway, it was mild on Friday and I needed to know where I was up to on the ride. I set off for Wales. Turns out the mild was in sheltered bits, it was blowing a gale. I managed 20  miles into the teeth of it then turned around. The wind was so bad, and so focused in one direction, that I rode up the long, steep drag out of Frodsham still in the saddle, on my aero bars. On the way out I was actually having to pedal to keep my speed up going down the damn thing. So my first “long” ride was only 40 miles, but I’m taking lots of positives from it. It’s cured me of my trepidation for a start. I now know I can just grind out a bunch of hours without it killing me. Also, I trialled my thick wool socks and waterproof/ windproof overshoe things. My feet didn’t go horribly numb and aching with the cold. That was a nice surprise. I’m going to do the same as I did with run, short (going to work) during the week, up the mileage of the big rides every weekend. 40 miles is a good starting point. Without the wind I think I’m good for 60 next time. Then up it 10 miles a week or something. And fit in a long turbo. That really works you. I was quietly pleased with that ride. Not too bad. Then I got home and tried to walk up and down the stairs. My quads (is it? Front of leg, over knee) were set solid. Talking to Wendy later I realised, (already knew, but it brought it home) that I only have 2 weeks until the Manchester marathon. Bugger, set legs or not, no skipping my long run. I got ready and warmed up my battered legs, tossing about ideas. In the end I decided I needed to know I had it in me, so went for the full marathon. It was hellish. By about 10 miles my legs were like rocks, but I just ground it out. Half of the battle is mental toughness. That was an all-you-can-eat buffet of mental toughness, I can tell you. Anyway I did it. It wasn’t pretty or fast, but it’s within […]

I’ve only been training for 10 weeks, after 4 years away from swimming and biking, and 5 months away from running. Today I did a 20 mile run. It was hellish, but I did it. A bad, painful 20 miles, is still 20 miles. The reason (I think) it was so terrible is actually a good thing.  I was at the gym last week and a tri geezer came on and jumped on the tri exercise bike (spin bike thing). I was on the treadmill at the time but I was watching him out of the corner of my eye to pick up tips. Position and such looked just as uncomfortable for him, but what I noticed was he was going really slowly. I jump on, put it in a fairly tough gear and grind out a half hour or hour. He maxed the gear and slowly forced the pedals around.  That got me thinking back to when I was good on a bike. When we were teenagers and we’d nip to Wales for the afternoon we just stuck it in tenth gear and went. *lightbulb* So that’s the game plan now, no more of this “expert” nonsense. I’ve raised my saddle and moved the aero bars and saddle forward into a position that feels good for me. Bugger all that running through the gears to maintain a steady rpm, bollocks. That just maintains your muscle level as it slowly builds your stamina. Top gear, and push. That’s how you build muscles. It was only a few weeks ago I got the bike and simply couldn’t ride in top gear. Even for short distances. Now the Beast From The East has finally let up I’ve taken to riding to work again. Top gear, and push. I’ve only done it 2 days, 9.8 miles each way. Changing down gear on the hills less each ride. The last ride I did the whole journey in top gear. (I want to say “10th”, but the bike has 22 gears, so 22nd I suppose, but that means nothing.) Now I know I can, that means I must. I’m going to have legs of steel. And muscles! Which is a long winded way of saying I totally buggered up my calves on the ride, so they set like concrete on the run. Hence the misery of my 20 mile run today.   I asked work for shorter runs a few weeks back. Ali, the planner, has been trying. Three times last week I was planned for 7 hour runs (if you finish at 7 hours and they have no other work for you, you can go home and still get paid your 9 hours.) One early finish they found me another run so I ended up doing 10.30, two other occasions the transport office took it on themselves to change my run from the one for which I’d been planned. Last week, on this short shift arrangement, I worked 57 hours. On Wednesday I worked […]

I screwed up my courage and went to the Warrington Triathlon Club swim session. Hooray! They are a really keen bunch, with two proper training coaches. I did two lengths then they started trying to sort me out. Being basically untaught since whatever they said at school they have their work cut out. I was windmilling, my breathing is all wrong, I need to rotate my body with the strokes, lift my head by 45 degrees when face down, stretch out my leading arm, raise my elbow on the pulling arm,and only kick to balance my strokes. The killer one for me is the breathing. I am aware of all the others and I’m trying to put them into place, but buggered if I can get the breathing. Rest your head on your leading arm, push the arm forward to rotate in the water, as your pull arm clears your face, breathe. Ha! Suck in loads of water and cough your guts up, more like.  If I can crack the breathing I really stand a chance. As one of the coaches noted: “You swim like a runner.” Hahaha. Fair point. I’ve broke the ice now, just got to keep going and I can batter this. One of the coaches took me to look at the lads in the fast lane. It was an awesome sight. It looked like zero effort, half the strokes I was taking, and they just glided down the lane. And they were about 3 times as fast as me, on 100% effort. If I can get those skills… I’ve still not been out for a long test ride. The weather has gone from cold and horrible to fucking freezing and unbearable. The Beast From The East, they are calling the arctic weather front. I’ve been going to the gym and doing brick sessions. Just half an hour on the bike, then an hour on the treadmill, but the bike kicks the crap out of your legs for running, so it feels harder than it sounds. Yesterday I did an hour on the bike, on a ‘hills’ setting, then ran 7 miles (smidge over an hour). I was off today so I did an hour in the baths, trying and trying and trying to get the breathing sorted. Nope. Hopefully they can sort me out over the coming weeks at my Tri club. Ooh, that felt good. My Tri club. Then I went back and did half an hour bike, but only managed 5 miles on the run. I think the beasting yesterday, and the swim, must have took it out of me. One thing, I’ve had a very belated and utterly obvious epiphany. I’ve been going to the gym in my running shorts. These are lycra with a mesh undercarriage. Which is not a good thing if you are wriggling about on a saddle. Basically I’ve been grating my bollocks. I noticed this by getting in the shower then trying not to scream like a girl. […]