Category: Uncategorized

The Honda VFR is sometimes called a Veefer. I’ll get my coat. Trial and tribulations, I’ve bloody had them. I put the VFR800 in for a full service as the back brake was wooden and weird. The advisories on the MOT were for worn brake pads and front tyre. I’ve already changed the tyre. I thought if the previous owner had let it get in  that state I’d better get everything checked and professionally set right. I booked it in to a full-on bike garage. I had to wait 2 weeks for an appointment. Then they took the bike off me and held on to it for a week. I got it back and rode it to work. The back brake was still shite. They’d only changed the front brake pads despite the MOT. They gave me a big list of all the work they’d done. Of which “rear brake, tested, OK”, and “test ride, OK” were but two. The more I thought about it the angrier I got. If the back brake hadn’t been touched that meant I couldn’t trust any of the other things on the tick list. I rang them up demanding to know why the hadn’t touched the back brake, the sole reason I’d put it in for service and brake change. The guy said it seemed OK. I said that it’s wooden. You can stand on the rear brake pedal and not lock up the back wheel. “You took that for a test ride and thought it was safe?” He said to bring it back on Saturday to put it through a brake test. Right. Getting shit sorted, me. Then riding it home I really put the brake through it’s paces. Speed up, stand on brake. Nope, still not locking up. Slowed right down though. Tried again. And again. One thing I did notice, the front end was diving under heavy braking. That’s not right, back end should lock and slide, front should remain unaffected. Oh dear. I got home and googled it. On my VFR750, the back brake feels normal and you can lock it fine. For the VFR800 they introduced linked braking. Oh dear, oh dear. Under heavy braking the rear brake, rather than lock and slide, activates the front brake to stop you. Virtually impossible to lock the back up. And the MOT advisories were for worn front brakes pads. Not rear. Oh dear, oh dear, oh dear. I had to ring the bike garage up the next day and apologise. That was character building. Must have given the mechanic a laugh. I have a Cone Of Shame on order. XXXL. Also, whilst the 800 was in I was riding my 750. And I loved it. I got to thinking it felt a smoother engine with better power delivery. So not good. Just got a pristine version of my ideal bike, bought a stainless steel exhaust system and bloody expensive top box and rack, then decide I prefer the older (not fuel […]

We went to Scotland for a break last week. It was proper nice. We saw wild deer, visited Cawdor castle (Shakespeare or history or some such) and tramped about a bit. Quite splendid. So that was all very nice. I have to own I was missing my bike though. I was glad to come back to my own bed and my bikes. Yep, I’m old.   Forgot. The VFR750 has a dashcam thing. I left it running, in the rain, and captured this. Oops, baldy bastard Bucky. I explored the options. Try to look cool with a toupee: but end up looking like this: So it had to go. *sad face* Or, in the wild The full version of that pic is better, but you can’t see my hair. Which might be a good thing. Ho hum, 51.  I’ve had a good innings.   I returned to work on Sunday, (12hrs 45), then Monday (12hrs). As I was finishing on Monday one of the drivers asked me if I’d got one of the full time jobs that were going. What full time jobs? I asked the transport clerks and they said they’d asked people about 2 weeks ago. While I was on holiday. Gutted. I’d already asked for full time the last time they asked, 4 months ago. The clerk said to ring a manager today (Tuesday, my day off) and enquire about it. From the tone of the driver I thought they’d already given the jobs out. I rang anyway. He wasn’t in. Then out of the blue a senior manager rang me. Which shift did I want? I was caught on the hop, but tried to catch up with the conversation as it went on. He was talking like I’d put my name down, been through selection and got the job. He offered me 13.00hrs start, Sunday-Thursday, 11.00hrs, same, or 07.00-10.00 on a weird, rolling shift thing. I initially said the 7-10, but he said the rolling thing meant it was 4 out of 5 Sundays, and 2 Saturdays. He said to think of the weekends. Fair do’s. So I said if at all possible I’d like to go for the 11.00hrs, Right, start next week. If they can get it up and running in time, I’m to have Saturday off and start on Sunday! Bloody great! There’s also an unconfirmed rumour that Tesco’s are have had enough of Stobbarts and are thinking of returning to in-house drivers. I wouldn’t mind the buy-out as long as we don’t have to work for the green terror.   The other thing of note. I was all excited as I booked my bike in for a full service, change the brake pads, and do the fork seals and oil. I booked it in two weeks ago. This was the first available appointment at this dedicated bike garage I’ve found. I took the bike in this morning (day off) expecting to pick it up this afternoon. The guy said “We’re really busy […]

I know. This is of no interest to anyone but me. I’ve given up imagining anyone but me reads this, so that’s alright, then. It’s been a rollercoaster ride. I was trying to be sensible and sell the two bikes to pay for that gorgeous, fully sorted one. But I kept looking at it, then looking at every other VFR750 up for sale, then back at it. None of the others were sorted. Some were tidy, some were low miles, but I would have still had to splash out on fork springs (£118), rear shock (£300), on some of them the stainless steel exhaust system (£300) etc… I drove Wendy nuts with my obsessing. She told me to get the bike just to shut me up. Win! I texted the guy, but it was an 18 day old advert. No reply. I was despairing thinking he’s sold it. Tried an email, some people don’t like texts. He replied, still had it! Joy unbounded! I arranged to go and see it, arse-end of beyond. Got the cash out, bought the train ticket, (£47, nearly 5 hours trip) arranged the insurance, went to bed all full of new bike joy. Woke up to “DO NOT TRAVEL, BIKE SOLD!” Devastated beyond words. My perfect bike, sat there unwanted for 19 days, I was on my way to make sure it was as described then hand over the cash, and some bastard snapped it up. I lost £20 cancelling my insurance, and the £47 for the train ticket because I’d booked it in advance. But that was just salt in the wound. So gutted. So, as ever, I changed my plan. I thought, “Bugger it. There is nothing wrong with my bike. It’s a bit scruffy but the engine is solid as rock, I’ll just sort that out on the cheap.” I window shopped all the prices, it came to over £600 in bits, some of which were hard to fit, the mechanics charge £63 per hour labour, so over a grand. And I’d still have a scruffy bike. I was up for it. But Wendy who is, as I say, (justifiably) heartsick of me fucking about about with bikes, said “Why not just bite the bullet and buy the new (2014, £6,500) one? You won’t have to do anything to it. For ever.” I was sorely tempted. I want, I want. But it’s so much money. I spent hours googling. It turns out the reason the VFR750 is a legend of reliability and bulletproof engine over-engineering is the gear driven cams. There is no cam chain to slap, stretch or snap. But cam chains are much cheaper and easier to manufacture. So after a decade or so of utterly redeeming themselves Honda went back to cam chains in 2002. Cue cam chain issues. It’s Honda, so I expect they quickly got it right, but it was the cam chain model that nearly ruined their reputation, and after they stopped the gear driven cams […]

My biking obsession is driving Wendy to despair. But I’m sure she’s sharing my joy, really. Deep down inside. Well hidden. Behind a smokescreen of rage. Anyway. I got that TL1000S after the Motorcycle News (MCN) review that basically said it will scare the shit out of you and try to throw you into the scenery.  Guess what? It scared the shit out of me and tried to throw me into the scenery. Oddly it’s not as much fun as it sounds. It was just an awesome, full-on, loony machine. There was no ‘potter around’ setting. You were either committed or parked. It still sounds fun. In real life that’s great for dry, straight roads, terrifying in the wet at roundabouts.  It’s probably just me, never having had a race bike before, but it was just too much. Being a V twin 1000cc the power didn’t build with the revs it just kicked you in the arse as soon as you touched the throttle. I couldn’t feed it in. I was in two minds about it. I’ll never own a bike that awesome again, but if it’s that bad in summer, imagine riding it to work through winter? I was on riding on eggshells as it was. The tickover problem decided me. The (£60 p/h!) Suzuki specialist mechanics said it would need an engine strip to find the problem, possibly thousands of pounds. I sold it. I was going to sell my CB750 as well. Put it through the MOT before the insurance runs out on the 21st, and it failed. Of course it did. Back brake disc worn, pads buggered. Also advisory on chain. I remain in a state of flux over bikes, so I pulled the ebay listing, ordered the disc, (already had some pads) and chain and sprocket set and was going to keep it. I’m finishing off fitting it today when the rain stops. Then I came across an MCN review of the Honda VFR750 from the 90’s.  “For many, bike journalists included, the best road bike ever built.” Whoa! MCN don’t mince their words. (My favourite being a review of a supersports bike “Goes like buggery. Just as uncomfortable.”) That is a breathtakingly audacious statement. Apparently Mr Honda had the idea that a V4 engine was the future, rolled out the first generation of bikes, but they were flawed, “chocolate cams”, cams kept buggering up. So it was either scrap the whole V4 concept and accept brand humiliation or redesign it as the most wonderfully over-engineered, bullet-proof, benchmark legend ever to be built. Honda. Obviously they redeemed themselves. MCN: “A Honda PR man once (fairly) famously joked that “I don’t care how much a VFR costs, it’s worth three times as much.” He’s not far wrong.”  “For a Japanese superbike, the VFR is about as good as it gets. Build quality is sublime, reliability… is total. Don’t let high mileages put you off: VFR head over 75,000 with impunity…” So then I *had* to have […]

I know, another boring bike entry. I want to share the joy and terror that is my new beast. I’ve de-badged it since that picture. Took off all the stupid ‘Relentless’ stickers and such. It looked like a boy racer’s Subaru. Seems you heat them with a hair dryer which melts the glue and they peel off, then use GooGone to wipe away the residual glue. Gawd bless the internet. There is still a problem with tickover. I’ve tracked down and joined a TL owner’s group, TLWorld, and found it’s usually down to to the Throttle Position Sensor (TPS) needing adjustment and the the air mixture in the cylinders need balancing. Something about throttle bodies, I think. The TPS thing is what it says, something that senses where the throttle is and tells the computer to throw petrol at the engine. It doesn’t look too big a job, but you have to strip all the fairing off. If I’m doing that I may as well service it as well, so I’ve got plugs, oil filter, air filter, and all the gaskets to the exhaust (which is still too loud, I’ve ordered some –second hand- genuine Suzuki TL1000s end cans as a last ditch attempt to quiet it down). I’ll service it, replace the exhaust gaskets, fit the standard end cans, adjust the tickover, set the TPS and balance the throttle bodies (or whatever that bit is called.) If it’s still cutting out then I’m taking it to the professionals. It’s a hazard to shipping at the moment. I was sat between the cars at the lights, revving up a massively loud bike like a boy racer just to keep it from dying, then I let the clutch out and it stalled. In my embarrassment I hit the starter, grabbed a hand full of revs and dumped the clutch, all in one motion. Wheelied away between the traffic. So not good. Another bracing moment was heading over Kingsway bridge. I shot up behind a car, which then put it’s indicator on and braked towards the pavement. Whatever. I swerved past it, accelerating. Police car in the middle of the road heading straight for me! Oops. Hit the brakes and the back end swung right out. The brakes are fierce! In a split second it slewed so far round I thought I was getting spat off. I lifted and straightened up just before, but my arse gave an almighty twitch, I can tell you.   As I say, I’ve joined TLWorld. It’s the first owner’s group I’ve seen that host a list of “Fallen Members.” Pretty sure my last Japanese sports machine club, the Micra owner’s group, didn’t have a list of the glorious dead. I’m going to leave instructions so I can be added should my luck run out. It is such a beast. With the low speed problem at the moment, especially, she’s just screaming “MORE! MORE! RIDE ME, YOU PUSSY!”  the whole time. It’s a six speed box, easily […]